Saved By An Angel


WARNING! Make sure your life insurance policy is up to date. I'm not responsible for you reading this and dying from laughter.

This may disgust, horrify and make you wonder why you paid me good money (20 cents) to write this you but I'm going to say it anyway.

I almost died masturbating. And I'm here to tell you, "Let's make hay while the sun shines." has been clinically proven to drown you in mud while 12 feet under stacks of hay.

If Saint Peter who guards the gates of heaven is real, he would have been laughing his ass off at the sight of me on that day believe you me -- wait, does he have an ass in heaven?

He'd probably tell me after I made millions of other souls standing in line behind me, "Get back down there and give me 50 more years of pain, misery and sorrow -- and you will love every minute -- and quit trying to change the course of history."

Sometimes, I don't know which is worse. Having a vivid imagination and trying to entertain or bore you all with tons of details.

Let's start off with a map. See the dark blue arrow? Its down in the middle to the right. Imagine if this image was taken 40 years ago instead of today. What are the chances that a man would just be walking by, ask for water and save me? 

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